Life is filled with lessons that early on can lead to effects that last for decades. I remember when I was younger, I was told by a student in class when the teacher called on me, that she should not have asked me to participate in class because I had nothing to say. I was always shy about public speaking and when I heard her say that, it really made me feel like I was voiceless in this world and whatever bothered me or made me angry, I kept inside because I felt no one would listen. This stems from early childhood with my family and their inability to really listen to me. I remember when I was 8 or 9 years old, I would say something to my family and they would not even acknowledge what I had said. Even if I screamed, they would just say I'm misbehaving and send me to my room. I did not have anyone there to help me, to nurture me and tell me my voice mattered, that what I had to say counted. I think one gains confidence and self-esteem from the family he or she interacts with. Because I had these negative interactions with the people...

I had become a people pleaser and would let people take charge while I stayed in the background, quiet. I am not that way anymore, but I could see why that girl in class said what she did. She saw me as a quiet person, someone that really did not contribute anything to class discussion. That feeling of inadequacy changed from just a feeling to a fear. I had become afraid to speak in public for fear I would be embarrassed and made fun of because I did not have the support system to make me feel like the effort would be worthwhile.
I am reminded of this show I saw on television. I remember I saw a tiger cub walking away from its mother to explore. The tiger club was hesitant at first, but with a few reassuring pats from the mother, it was able to move around and feel the confidence and reassurance needed to see and experience things on a level the tiger cub could not before. That is what I was lacking at…